re: “SJW” & Ugly Art Styles. (We Will Never Be Free From Tumblr)

Okay. I'm not discussing any lgbt discourse in this blog update so don't get discouraged by the title and click off just yet. It’s gonna be really far from that. I was just thinking about talking about the whole SJW/Tumblr Art Style thing since that was a big discussion topic amongst artists and casuals alike since it was basically being reinvented on xitter and I was forced to look at and think about it again after having not heard those talking points since 2016.

The thing about Twitter as a site for discussion is that it fundamentally isn’t meant for it, or at least for any meaningful and nuanced conversation. But that won’t stop people (and sometimes me, I won’t lie) from trying anyway!

Anyway, about the topic in question. This all comes from the fact that someone had reposted artwork from someone who’d been outed for (allegedly)pretending to be black, being a transmisogynist, and making their Jewish of Israeli. Their artwork was, for lack of better wording, pretty ugly. And the question of why white people have such ugly art styles in an attempt to be unique was brought up. This question has been on my mind for a hot minute and I don’t really have a definitive answer, but I wanted to ramble about it.

For one: I think it’s interesting that people were saying that they pretended to like their art while they were active but had been so glad to not have to do that anymore when the person was outed as problematic. But I can’t lie, something about that leaves a really sour taste in my mouth. More so the latter statement than the former. This isn’t defending that person or their actions, I just think it’s weird to willingly pretend or force yourself to enjoy an art style that you find unappealing instead of just blocking, muting, or generally choosing not to engage with the person’s art. It’s okay to just dislike it, and move on with your life. If you find something ugly, you find it ugly! And that’s fine.

But it also got me thinking about people’s art being considered bad after they’re outed for being problematic in some way. While I think criticism is okay to be levied at artwork, in a constructive manner of course, I think a lot of people would be better off realizing they want an excuse to bully people. It makes me think of that artist who spawned the whole extremely unfunny “rendering process :]” meme on art tiktok a while back, to the point where people were making up shit about the artist to justify bullying them as hard as they did. You don’t need a moral reason to dislike anything, you can just dislike it. Bad people can make good art, and while I think they should be mocked for their actions and what they did wrong I just don’t see the usefulness in mocking someone’s art if it had nothing to do with what they did wrong? Maybe that’s just me, I don’t know. I can’t tell people how to and not to hate, but at least be honest about your intentions.

In this case, with the weird racist artist, I think it’s pretty apt. If you’re using your artwork to perpetuate transmisogynistic shit about trans women then you should be mocked for doing just that.

But circling back to that question which intrigued me so much, “why do people try so hard to make their styles unique, to the point where it ends up looking ugly?” I think it stems primarily from a lack of skill. I don’t mean that as an insult by the way, just objectively speaking. A quote that comes to mind in particular is “learn the rules before you break them,” and I feel like artists who do this break the rules before actually learning them properly. That’s not to say that I think every artist needs to study the fundamentals for thirty years before drawing or anything, but I think it helps to have some basic baby level understanding of anatomy before stylizing so hard you end up creating artistic monstrosities. Unless that’s what you’re going for. In which case, go right ahead!

Intention is also something to consider here. If your intent is for your artwork to be unappealing, go right ahead. Be my guest! But I think there’s a difference between intentionally ugly art on purpose and intentionally ugly art on accident, if that makes sense. Trying to make your art ugly while still having some understanding of what you’re doing in comparison to trying to make your art ugly while having no idea what you’re doing. And like I said, it comes down to a matter of skill level.

That does lead me to another question that was raised about this conversation though. Particularly this one. 

You see what I said earlier about a lot of this feeling like “SJW/Tumblr Art Style” rhetoric? People trying too hard to be inclusive in their art style and all that, what a way to phrase a question LOL. But the answer lies in the same answer that I gave for the previous one; lack of skill, or lack of care.

The fact of the matter is that if you’re going to attempt to draw black people in some kind of accurate way you do have to learn how to draw our features. It’s not all that scary, trust me, but if you don’t put the effort into that you end up with a whole lot of ashy people with heat damaged hair that people usually do when they clearly don’t know how to draw black people but try anyway. For beginner artists, it’s not as egregious as in comparison to if you’re a very clearly experienced and skilled artist, and it’s as simple as using references and studying how we actually look to get it right. (But this isn’t even limited to just black people, I feel like it can go for most people of colour.) 

See, I do have to admit I have a problem with this question. Because when people ask this it almost always ends up targeting people who draw fat people, people with body hair, darker skin, gnc people, or trans people who don’t pass. It almost never takes into account that people like that, y’know, actually exist.  

Another example I saw and that’s worth mentioning is how the artist —- formerly known as puppychan —- draws trans men. He tends to draw them fat, being pre-top surgery, and in revealing and feminine clothing. Lots of people seem to take issue with that when personally, it was pretty inoffensive to me? People love to shit on artists who make their trans men feminine, or make their trans women masculine (although they’re not exactly equal since some of people who make their trans women don’t do it with tact.) and it’s kind of funny since in the year of our lord 2025 you’d think that we would be past the need for people to conform to gender roles. Guess not. But trans people can dress and present however they want, and if artists are exploring these differences in presentation in a good faith, I really fail to see what the issue is.

The word “caricature” often gets thrown around in these kinds of conversations but it makes me question if the people who say it even know what the word means. Don’t get me wrong, it’s entirely possible for someone to make an oc which is an unintentional caricature, but how does drawing gnc people, people with body hair, disabled people, etc. just living fall into that? For it to be a caricature it’d have to be made with the intent of parody or mockery, if it’s not doing that I just don’t see what the problem is.

That’s about everything I wanted to discuss. It could entirely possible that I take things in far too much good faith and don’t see the negative, oh well. If you have thoughts leave them in the comments, I would like my think pieces to have some kind of discussion with them! That’s it though, this is malik signing out.

p.s - alt title was going to be ‘Every so Often People Reinvent Tumblr Discourse But On Twitter and We're All Forced To Deal With it.’ but that’s way too long, that’s also why the first paragraph is that.

4/24/25, Relax Yourself, Boy Please Settle Down.

Hey friends, friendettes, and frixnds. I've returned with another blog update.

So, little FYI. When you think it can't get worse, it probably can. Or purrhaps that's my weird brain talking since I have a tendency to think up nothing but the worst pawssible scenarios when I'm in a bit of a pickle. And at the moment, I am in one of those pickles. Stress has been killing me lately, and trying not to think too hard about the many things that stress me out isn't helping as well as it used to.

It's kind of funny, actually. I was really anticipating today since my mom is supposed to be coming home today and I missed her really badly. I wanna go home so bad. But oh well, I'll just wait for her to come home. I have to much I want to talk to her about that I hadn't gotten the chance to. Well. That's a lie, I just hadn't since I value talking to her in person over a video call. I love my mom, she's awesome.

Anywho, I don't really know what else to talk about. I'd just started writing since I was upset and now I'm stuck in this strange place where I feel like I forgot what I'm supposed to be upset about. Weird since it hadn't started that long ago. Oh well, whatever it was must've been crazy!

As of late, I've really wanted to switch up my hair though. I want to get some twists done, small to medium size. Maybe make them dark red or something, I've always loved some red in my hair, it's a good look! The only problem is that I'm both attached to and sort of sick of the hair I have now. The thing that's going for me is that I've had it in for so long, and I get lots of compliments on it when I go out. Like. A lot. Even one of my friends in class had told me that my hair is really iconic, whenever she sees it in the halls she already knows its me. That thought excites me as much as it terrifies me. Oh dear... people RECOGNIZE ME BY MY HAIR!!! So scary, so so scary. But on the other side, all of my family members tell me that my hair is hideous. I would just say the female ones but the male ones do too. As illogical as it sounds, I'm a lot more inclined to believe my family members telling me my hair sucks than the random strangers I see around who tell me my hair is gorgeous. Maybe they're all in on some kind of inside joke that I'm not aware of? No, that's stupid, it purrobably just looks good and I take my family member's comments too much to heart. 

Anyway, HAIR. I'm thinking about adding some charms in there as well to really dazzle up my twists. The only thing I fear is the fact that I won't have any bangs like I usually do for my hair. Major bummer. But. Dot dot dot. I think it's a great opportunity to try something new, and it's the beginning of a new era in my mind.

I'm pretty certain I've talked about this before, but the beginning of a new hairstyle is sort of like the beginning of a new era in my life, and I feel a new era of my life starting soon, for better or for worse. I wanna see where this one takes me, fuck around and find out. 

But that's about it, hope you enjoyed this short update. I'll see you when I see you, this is Momo, signing out.

p.s hope you like the new font, I think I sure do.

4/16/25, Brain Bleeds & Good Deeds

Yet another update of my blog, who woulda thunk it? I've returned since I like updating my blog and I just spent about two hours looking through old blogger urls.

https://feferipeixes.blogspot.com/ this one's my favorite. The layout is absolutely beautiful, and I thought the entries were really nice. I liked them a lot. It makes me wanna do some updating to my layout but I think I'll worry about that at a later date. 

Been feeling a lot better than I did last update, I'll say that much. I'm still kind of stressed because of school related shit but I'll live. My anxieties are preventing me from doing the things I need to to have open communication with my professor and advisor. In the words of Lit: "ITS NO SURPRISE TO ME I AM MY OWN WORST ENEMY!!!" Right now though, I'm okay. Other than those worries. I do have to say though my head's been acting kind of weird the more I think about it.

I tend to do this weird thing where when I think too hard about something I forget what exactly it is I was thinking of. For example, when I go to put my lunch pin I sometimes think too hard about what the pin number was, and I forget it. It's weird. My memory has always been spotty but I feel like I've been thinking more about just how weird it is. I also tend to have these headaches that make it feel like my brain is bleeding a little. It isn't. I think. My brain gets this strange sensation that I don't like sometimes. There's thing drawing I've seen on tumblr of Jake English of his head cracked slightly and like. colors flashing like with lord english you know? It's strange. That's how I feel a lot of the time, like my brain's been damaged when it really hasn't. probably anyways. I want to glue the cracks in it back together, so I can sort of feel normal again.

Good deeds though, that part. I've been staying with my aunt for a bit since my mother is out of the country and it's given me the opportunity to spend time with my family. I look after my baby cousin, and it can be pretty hard and annoying sometimes but I love him. I kind of realized that kids are about as fragile as glass, and I don't mean just because their health is more brittle, I mean that because just about every minute thing you do around a kid impacts their development more than you'll ever know. I mean, think about it. Something as simple as teaching a kid how to ride a bike or tying their shoes, or how to draw, have the potential to be core memories in their lives despite the fact that it doesn't seem that important in the moment. Or at least to me. Some of my fondest memories were faking being asleep so that one of my parents could carry me out of the car into the house. It was probably just a nice deed to them, but it meant a lot to me. And it still does. So I wanna give my baby cousin as many good experiences as I can, so he has good memories of me for when he gets older. Besides, if I don't, who will?

It has also made me realize that I'm kind of unsure of if I want kids of my own, though. My cousin is cute and lovely and all, but I don't know if I have the patience to handle taking care of a whole baby for 18 years and raising it. My aunt views having kids akin to a moral duty, if you've been given the gift of life then it naturally makes sense that you should share it with someone else right? No. Wrong. That's stupid. Having kids is not your moral duty it's a choice you make for a multitude of reasons. The idea that having children makes you more morally sound than someone else who chooses not to is dumb, really dumb. I mean sure, giving someone the gift of life sounds good on paper, but life doesn't just begin and end with birth. You have to take in what kind of world you're birthing this child into, if you can afford to properly care for the kid, provide for them, etc. To be honest, with the current state of the world I wouldn't feel good about giving birth to a kid right now. I mean, not that I can, but I wouldn't if I could. I just don't like it when people ascribe moral duty to having kids for populating the earth, or giving people more life or whatever. Because their idea of life is just being alive, but it's so much more than just being alive and breathing. But people don't get that, and it drives me up a wall.

That's about it though. I hope you enjoyed reading cause I liked writing it! This is paw, signing out.

PS; I'm changing the font after this update from here on out. Try to guess what it is!

4/11/25, I Want Something Else, to Get Me Through This!

Hello friends, friendettes, and frixnds. I've returned to my blog with another update after, like, a MONTH. It's been so long, I realize that and I apawlogize for it. I’ve been telling myself I’m gonna update the blog, I wanna update and talk about this, this, or that! And then I never do. Womp womp. But I promise I’m actually going to do it today and this is proof of that! Let’s just hope I finish this and it’s not unfinished forever like my other drafts.

So. Life. I went to the cherry blossom festival with Roxy and my sibling and their friend and I had a blast. I’m gonna blog more in depth about that experience probably on a later date because I have a feeling this update is going to be a lot more negative than my usual ones, and I wouldn’t want to taint that lovely experience with the tome of bellyaching I’m probably going to get up to here. But look out for that soon. For now, as to not spoil the post, just know that it’s probably the best experience I’ve had this entire month, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Oh yeah, full disclosure this post is probably gonna be a whole lot of vent but still pretty vague so don’t worry about it too much.

Outside of that, though, I can’t lie, things have kind of sucked. I think this might be the worst month I’ve had all year. I’ve been trying to stay positive and look forward to the light at the end of the tunnel but it just got me thinking about what happiness even is to me any more. Deep, I know. Super deep. But like ever since about December of last year I think(? I can’t exactly put a real date on it.) I’ve decided that I want to be happy, so I’m going to do everything in my power to make sure that I can be and will be. And doing everything in my power to make sure that people know that I’m happy. Because I am! I think? I don’t really know, argh. That’s my issue.

Anyways, getting off topic. I decided that I want to be happy and I’m gonna live every day with that attitude in mind. And so far it’s worked pretty well, I mean with some bumps up and down the road. But when I don’t feel happy, it’s the worst. I mean obviously since nobody wants to feel upset unless you’re some kind of emotional masochist, but when things are low, they’re low. Like last week has probably been the worst week I’ve had all year of just crap after crap piling up to make a giant shit sandwich that I have to try and ignore for the sake of being happy. But just how real is that happiness if I have to ignore all of my issues until they pile up and stare me dead in the face to the point where I can’t ignore it? It all feels so fragile at some point, like no matter how hard I attempt to run from the sadness that used to feel so encompassing in my life it’s still there, and there’s nothing I can do to fix that. That’s probably an extremely nihilistic way to look at it, but how good is just writing it off as nihilism when it’s something that I feel? I’m not exactly sure.

“Sadness is a fleeting feeling” is something I often tell myself just to help myself get over the feeling. For the every thunderstorm there’s a rainbow, after all. But I don’t know, maybe I’m just wallowing in the feeling but sometimes it would be nice to just allow myself to feel upset when I am upset and not try to get over it as quickly as possible so I can focus on being happy. Like it’s okay to feel things. It’s okay to feel sad, but also somehow it doesn’t feel okay to feel sad because that just makes you feel miserable. It’s complicated, as are most things. 

Have you ever listened to a song that could alternate between being comforting in the sense that it makes you feel like everything’s gonna be okay, but also comforting in the sense that it just kind of lets you sit with that feeling for a while and just feel it. That’s how I feel about lots of songs, most of which I can’t remember the names of off the top of my head. Right now, that song for me is The Absence of God by Rilo Kiley. I’ve been getting into Rilo Kiley lately, I love their music. But this song in particular feels like the painting Ophelia by Sir John Everett Millais. Primarily that it gives me the same pseudo-sensory experience of lying in the lake of cold water, contrasting with the warm feeling of my skin and sort of just closing my eyes. When you close your eyes it lets you take in and experience everything, you know? No visual distractions other than the sound of the forest and the coldness of the water. It’s also probably worth noting that Ophelia was dead in that painting LOL, and that part I think does also have a bit to do with my mental association.

The song itself is about self destructive tendencies in relationships, which I assume leaves the singer alone at some points. But I also think about the absence of god bringing comfort as an absence of life, since god is the creator of all life and sort of representative of it in a sense. I don’t know, art is in the eyes of the beholder, I think that’s how the saying goes. The point is that I like that song and it makes me feel comfortable, or just makes me relax depending on the mood. And right now it certainly feels like an Absence of God type of day. One might even say, it’s Suicide Friday. And hey, it actually IS Friday, so it works!

That’s about all I have to say, you can choose to take whatever you’d like from this blog update that’s up to you really. I just hope you’re certainly doing better than I am right now, haha. This is momo signing out.